kids!!

Long day at work today...8 hours...but it was wonderful and enjoyable!! Worked at a kindergarten in Castle Hill as a causal childcare worker (hmm for those who don't know, this is what i referred to as my 'third job'). Was soooo good! Going back tomorrow yay!! So inconvenient in terms of catching public transport there, but my lovely parents will be picking me up tomorrow after work =) Hehe today i ended up having to call my dad actually, cos the silly bus didnt come grrr.....cos so drenched....if it was on a hot day i wouldnt have minded, but today....almost got me out of my good mood!

The kids were so great...don't know why but not long after meeting them i just realised i love them. Maybe i really do enjoy working with kids, more so than the elderly people at the nursing home. When they had their naps, i just looked at them sleeping, and listening to the soothing music that was played. Hmm so many thoughts, but mostly a realisation that these kids have such long (and difficult perhaps) journeys in front of them. Here they are sleeping so peacefully and securely, i just wish they could continue doing that always. Because let's face it, the world is corrupt and uncertain, and i believe that it gets worse and worse.

Yet there is hope! I imagined some of those kids graduating form primary school, wearing school uniforms to high school, and graduating from year 12 going up onto the stage to collect their HSC certificates. I imagined some of them in uni, which was as far as i went =P Working with children is so good because you chart their growth and development, unlike with the elderly where, to be blunt, you try to make the quality of their life as good as possible for as long as possible....there always seems to be deterioration =( Ohhh wot really touched me was two of the eighteen kids (4 yrs old) there drew pictures, and afterwards came up to me and said "this is for you"!!! Hehe let's call it abstract art, but i couldnt care any less wot they drew, the drawings were just so wonderful!! Such sweet kids!

But on a more serious note, it always raised thoughts in my mind in regards to being a parent. Sooo difficult, and self-sacrificial, i really wonder if i'll ever be 'good enough' to be a mother...one thing i realised is that you have to protect them and shield them and care for them as much as possible, yet at the same time, you have to learn to let go at times, even when it fills you with fear and anxiety. A continual process of protecting and letting go, caring and letting go...wow

Anyway tomorrow may bring more insights...ohh i might post up the drawings those kids gaves me hehe =) Ohh and I felt so tall being around them today =P